inspiration thru living.

Lately I've been getting down on myself about not keeping up with the blogging the way I feel I should. I worry about not posting on a daily basis or even on a bi-daily basis, and I stress like mad mamas when my blog-lovin' account starts shouting at me, "145 UNREAD POSTS!!!!" I stress, and then sometimes (lately), I laugh and wonder if maybe I'm taking this whole blogging thing a wee bit too seriously. After all, I started this thing for fun--I'm not even getting paid for any this, and while I do eventually hope to make a career out of writing (dare I say blogging itself?), for the time being, this space is a hobbie. A cubbie. A cubbie for my nonsense, my thoughts, my sometimes formal ramblings, and all the beautiful people that inspire me to share my heart and my ideas. Whether I post every day or once a week or two days in a row and then eight days later, I don't think it really matters, so long as I'm posting when I feel the most genuinely inspired to do so. Of course, if I was getting paid to do this, I think it would be a different story, I'd definitely have to come up with some sort of set schedule, but until that day comes, I'm not going to bite my finger nails over the fact that I haven't hit publish in a few days. Or that I'm a week behind in replying to comments.

The fact is this: We blog to talk about life. To record our happenings. To exchange our experiences. To showcase our ideas.

Maybe I'm wrong, but I think it's pretty hard to do this if we're not taking the time to go outside and pick some cherries with our real-life neighbors...iphones excluded. (I don't pick cherries with my real-life neighbors. But I would if I knew of some cherry trees. Actually, there was one right outside the Russian's apartment last week, and he did in fact pick a cherry and eat it, and I was scared because I read some old fables where that wasn't a smart idea. He didn't die, thankfully. And thus it became a rather cool moment in time, standing beside some handsome and very random Russian man beneath a giant cherry tree.)

While I gather much of my inspiration from experiences of my past, and even more inspiration from the many blogs I quietly stalk (many thanks to Erin for inspiring this very post), much of my inspiration comes in the moments when I am away from my computer. Away from my phone. It comes while I am driving or sweating it out on the stair master. It comes while I am in the company of others laughing and enjoying life in real time.

I believe that as humans, we are the most inspired through living.

And not just inspired, but experienced and matured.

The very last class I took in college for my degree was an intermediate acting course. My teacher was a pretty intense dude, 36, intimidating and at first glance a bit pretentious-seeming. Like maybe he was better at thinking he was all that, then actually being all that. Turns out, he was everything previously mentioned and also ALL THAT. The guy knew his shit and when he wasn't screaming at me to find stronger connections to my characters, he was sharing with all of us students, facts about life. Facts about his own life, stories of how he has found inspiration in his acting and how he has matured as an actor. He shared one personal story in particular that has really stuck with me.

When a drama student is approaching his or her's bachelor degree, there's this huge thing called URTA's that take place. It's basically like a giant audition conference, where undergrads come to audition for multiple grad programs looking to recruit new grad actors. Not every drama student attends URTA's. I didn't. It's mostly for those interested in getting their master's in Acting, though it has said to be a great experience to audition anyway, just to receive feedback and also see if there are any school's that woulda/coulda/shoulda been interested in you.

Anyway, my drama teacher shared with us his first experience of attending URTA's. Having done pretty well as an undergrad with getting casted in shows and what not, he felt pretty confident that there would be a handful of schools interested in having him. To his surprise, he received not a single a call back. Not one. The experience left him feeling so defeated, that he ended up taking an extended break from acting all together. He simply just lived his life without attending a single acting class or performing in a single production. Even though it had been his passion all his life, and the thing he had just received his college degree in, he separated himself form the acting world, describing it as a period in which he didn't just "give up", but rather "focused on other things." It wasn't until two years later, that he came back to URTA's for a second audition and with the SAME EXACT SET OF MONOLOGUES that he used two years prior, got SEVEN callbacks.

Naturally, in the movement of our teacher telling us this story we all looked at him in a very puzzling manner.... seven callbacks? After taking a two year break? Not a single acting class in between.. really?

"Yes," he replied, "Not a single acting class in between."

In a nutshell, he had taken time to LIVE. To experience things. Instead of study the creation of characters besides himself, he studied HIMSELF. He matured. And all of those things helped him become a better actor. It helped him have a better connection to those monologues that he didn't quite connect with in the past. They made his acting more believable, more real, and more raw.

Now, I'm not sure how perfectly this story parallels to blogging and taking time away from the computer, but it's a great story and I wanted to share it anyway! HA.

And still, I feel like it does connect in ways to these strange and modern times where we are living in a world that revolves heavily around technology and social media. A world where there is this constant pressure to feel organically inspired day in and day out, and share it with every FEED we know. But the problem is, organic inspiration isn't a consistent thing. In my opinion, it is not.  It isn't something that can be forced, put on a tight schedule, or pulled out of a hat. A lot of the time you gatta give it a break and come back to it after you've spent some time doing other things... i.e. LIVING (!!) This is not to say there aren't bloggers out there executing brilliant material on a daily basis (btw how the f do they do that, with like their husbands and babies and crafts and stuff?????), but I think the greatest of inspiration is sporadic, and most of all, it's personal. It comes not from another web link, or someone else's words, but rather, our own stories. Our own adventures in nature. Our own unique paths.

Which means it's up to us to take the time to step away every now and then, if not often, and go outside... and pick them cherries. Or go on a nature walk. Shit, do you guys remember those?! #naturewalkswereawesome

Basically, I'm sorry I don't post like everyday. But also, I'm not sorry. Haha, why am I apologizing?! Why does anyone apologize ever when it comes to posting? I'm still trying to find my groove in all of this while keeping my own personal priorities straight. To those who do post everyday, high five. You guys are impressive. Like seriously, I wanna go cherry pickin' with you... and steal all your tricks.

How do you guys work out balance between life and blogging? Where do you draw your daily inspiration from? Also, I'm curious, do you guys have posting schedules? If so, how did you determine those? Is it ever a struggle to keep up? As a new blogger, I'd love to hear your thoughts on all of this bibiddy bobbidy. #100questionIknow