me, myself, and i.

(and some trash cans!)
I think because I'm officially unemployed again/ about to get on a one-way flight in a week or so, I've lost my writing mo-jo joe-joe. I've just had a lot on my mind and it's been hard to sit down and get my fingers to do the talking. All I can muster out is, "hey kids, wanna go for some vodka?" And before I can really mean it, I resort to my bed where I end up napping for a good five hours. Only in between episodes of wishing Barney Stinson was a real person who I could marry.

Ah, I'm ok. Shit's about to get really exciting in my life. And I'm excited. I really am. But I'm also freaking out a little. Cause I'm a bit of a control freak at times and I do like to have a plan even though I dream about being "the girl with no plans".

Like I said, my writing mo-jo joe joe is out of commission at the moment and so I think I will participate in a link up right now. 

My girl Kristen is hosting this one so obvi I want in. Plus I think this might be a nice way for some of you to learn a thing or two about me, aside from the fact that I REALLY want to live in a New York ASAP and that I take wayyyy too many pictures of myself. 

So. Here are the ?s

1. What is your biggest phobia?

Definitely death. But not really death itself, more like, time of death. I am scared of dying young. Or dying before I have the chance to experience the things I want the most out of life. Not to say I'm not enjoying every moment as it comes or that I haven't been blessed with some incredible experiences in my life already, but there are other things that I desperately want for myself... like being a mother and having some tall, dark and funny lumberjack looking dude (or a Barney Stinson character) getting down on one knee. Ha ha, probably not in that order. But either way, I want those things. I also want to go places and see things in the world. I get scared of staying in one place for too long, for fear that I'm missing out on oceans of other cultures and experiences that at any moment can be stripped away from me in some horrible freak accident. I think I watch too much "1000 Ways to Die." I need to stop that. 

2. If you could relive any day of your life, which day would it be? 

Hmm. World Cup 1994? 2002? Brazil winning is always an emotional event that doesn't quite compare to anything else I've ever felt in this lifetime. And for the record---I know everyone always rolls their eyes or says "ugh" whenever it comes to the Brazilian team, cause we're so "full of ourselves"... blah blah blah...but whatever, dudes. We are the world's greatest soccer champs. Of course we are going to take pride in that. Of course we are going to celebrate and get loud and butt hurt whenever anyone else takes our crown and steals our thunder. I think that's only natural.

To be honest, I'm not even a huge soccer fanatic. I don't know all kinds of details about all the players on the team, or who's training where or when, or what games outside of World Cup are going on. But when the FIFA comes around every four years, you can bet your bottom dollars, I'm tuned in with the rest of my family. And we rage. I can't wait for our next victory. And until then, I'd love to relive the ones of the past. Those were some very happy days in my life. Not just cause winning feels good, but because celebrating a part of who you are feels good. 

Come on, 2014!!!!

Sisters and cousins goin' on a pride parade thru Ventura. We do this shit every World Cup... win or lose. 

3. If you could choose to stay a certain age forever, what age would it be?

This is a tough question because I've only lived for 24 years, and so I only know the life and times of a 24 year old. I think naturally, I'd pick to stay "forever young"... in my mid 20s now, but I don't know. They say sex only gets better with age... I think my 40s are going to be a pretty ravishing time, not afraid to say it. I also look forward to retirement someday. Sure, I'll be all wrinkly with gray hairs and stuff, but I'll have a garden and grandkids and season tickets to the regional theater. Maybe a porch? Sounds pretty chill. I also look forward to being old so that I can look back and do my favorite: analyze and reflect on every god damn thing that ever occurred in my lifetime. 

I hope blogging is still cool when I'm 70. 

Did I answer the question at all. I guess young? 25? I'll let the cliche win. P.S. I turn 25 next week... eeeee!

4. What celebrity do you get mistaken for?

Oh gosh. There's a few....

1. Amy Winehouse: Not so often anymore, but when my hair was black, I'd get it all the time.
2. Anne Hathaway: I don't see it. At all. But I'm totally flattered!!
3. Marisa Tomei: MOST common and my favorite. I do a happy dance every time anyone compares me to her. Have you guys ever seen My Cousin Vinny ? So good.
4. Punky Brewster: dur. 

For comparing/contrasting purposes...

1. A photo of me in case you don't know what I look like. (or forgot.) 
2. A photo of my Amy Winehouse hair days. Not the best photo, I'm aware. I most definitely look like I'm having an orgasm to some random fantasy novel. Also, I did something ridiculous with my hair in that specific photo, so don't be thinking that's how I walked around with my hair did. In summary, that was me circa 2006/2007 with my black hair. Being a strange person.

5. What songs are included on the soundtrack to your life?

Ah, so many songs that are near and dear. Here's a few of the constants:

Crimson and Clover : Anthem of my youth :)

Beautiful People : Such a perfect and beautiful song about loving your neighbors and being a friend to every soul you meet. I am constantly fascinated and interested in all kinds of people, so this song def speaks to me.

Wild is the Wind & Real Love : Brilliant songs that resonate with my ideas of what real love is and feels like. These are the love songs of my life.

Isn't Life Strange : A song my Dad used to play all the time. A little over the top, but I love it. A perfect song for my reflective soul.

Go West : Ok, this song is just SUPER DUPER corney, but it's another song my Dad used to play in the car and it's just so damn up beat and awesome. You know you agree. It's totally my "wake up and do epic shit today" jam.

Starlight : This is also my jam. I share it with my sister and we get gross excited every time it comes on. Also, Muse is my favorite band. Forever.

Suzanne : All I can say about this song, is...... Fuck. So beautiful. I know this song means so many different things to so many people, but for me it's all about letting go. Opening your heart and having faith in people/life/things. It's about living. feeling. believing. 

The Greatest : Another songs that speaks to my often defeated spirits. On letting go and not being too hard on myself all the time.

Stay or Leave : A song for some of my toughest break ups. This one says it all. 

Like A Prayer : Need I explain? Hands down one of the best songs ever. I go all out for this time. Everytime. Anywhere.

Weeeee. Happy Tuesday.


  1. you do look like Marisa Tomei! I'd never noticed!
    great music choices :)

  2. I think you do look like Amy..but a much PRETTIER version! :) And seriously FUNNY about your 40's. Too too great!

  3. I really love this post! You really do look like Marisa Tomei. I can see the Anne Hathaway in your smile :)

  4. Ahh! Your post is so fancy-schmancy! Your celebrity look-alikes is pretty spot on! I'm with you on #3, I don't think I've reached my favorite year yet!

    Happy Tuesday WOO!
    xo Kayla

  5. PUNKY BREWSTER - YES! I get it.

    I like you.

  6. What a fun link up!!! Never too many pictures of yourself ;)


  7. Loved getting to read more about you Punky :) And I totally see the Marisa Tomei although your winged eyeliner in the one picture is too GOOD not to be compared to Amy. And i know what you mean about a fear of dying young, I think I get that sometimes too.


  8. I think you look more like Marisa Tomei than the rest of those goobers! Pretty freaking hot, however, Amy winehouse not so much. Probably just because she's not my fav. person in the world. I have a fear of an untimely death too. That's kind of what I meant in my number one too, except I am scared of a family members untimely death. You have a way with words!

  9. Dude I can totally see the Marisa Tomei with an Anne Hathaway smile. I think they're pretty spot on. Also Brazilian fans are some of the most fun fans. Brazil is my dad's favorite team so I grew up watching people cheer on the team. Not to the crazy degree (though I'd love to experience that) but still cheering. I also haven't experienced my ideal age, but i think I jumped on the boat of saying mid twenties. Youd be a wise woman at 70 though, and I doubt you'd be in a place where you felt stuck.

    Anyway it was fun reading your link up! I don't think I've ever commented but I've been reading your blog for a while and it's one of my favorites. I think it just intimidated me because your writing is beyond admirable! Have a great time in NY! I know it's not with the intended plan but I'm sure it'll be fun nonetheless. And you'll get to live there eventually :)

  10. You're a MUCH prettier version of Amy Winehouse...MUCH! And Punky Brewster...definitely see it there, too! LOVE your choices for soundtrack songs. Like a Prayer is a fabulous song to belt out!

    New follower from the link-up! Can't wait to read more! :)

  11. I love that you are going to have season tickets to your regional theater someday. AND I HAVE ALWAYS THOUGHT YOU LOOKED JUST LIKE MARISA TOMEI! Also...very jealous of your naps. Very.

  12. This was great! I love your blog, newest follower. I also totally agree that you look like marissa Tomei (let the happy dance begin)

    Stopping by from the link up


  13. Love love love your playlist! You do look like Amy Winehouse, but much more beautiful of course :) Thanks for linking up dear!

    xo Shane

  14. I'm so excited I stumbled across your blog through the linkup! I'm a tiny bit obsessed with your playlist :)

  15. You totally look like a grown up amazinly beautiful version of Punky Brewster!! I love it! And i really love your answers and the thought you put into them. I also have that same fear of dying too young- that would be tragic! I'm totally lovin' that orgasming to a book photo :D hahaha annnd I think I'm just going to let your playlist keep going while I read everyone elses. Something tells me we have similar taste :) Thanks for linking up girl! Try to prepare as much as possible to help calm your nerves- I'm so excited for you!

  16. Wow, I can totally see all three of those (perhaps not the Punky Brewster so much ;)

  17. I'm ashamed to say it, but I seriously thought that photo of you WAS amy winehouse. I was like, wait... where did you get that picture of her. then I realized that I should READ. Yeah... I'm dumb. :)

  18. Found you on the Link Up and srsly, me love.
    I'm with you with NYC. Gotz to move like super STAT. I must like, recycle bottles and cans so I can apply for my nursing license for Concrete Jungle. Damn.

    i don't wanna die young. i wanna live till i'm 90. or maybe 85. i don't know. definitely old.

    peace, rima

  19. I have that same phobia. It terrifies me, especially now that I have a baby. I don't want to leave him without a mother growing up :(

    Just found your blog on the Me, Myself and I Linky Party. New Follower :)

    The Pretty Pinhead

  20. Hi there! So nice to "meet" you! It's so gun to get to know fellow bloggers better! I'm stopping by from the GFC Blog Hop and am now a new follower:) Would love for you to stop by Crazy Mama Drama!

  21. I may or may not have read the whole post but... MUSE FOREVER definitely caught my eye, I love this band, they are incredible.
    You seem pretty amazing I think I'll stick to your blog and watch you fullfill your dream ! You're very brave !


Your comments make my day! I read each and every one of them and try to deliver a response to as many as I can! Unless there's a discussion going, I will usually reach back to you via e-mail. Thank you for your willingness to speak and share your thoughts :) You is dope.